Ladies, 3 reasons why he won’t say ‘I love you’ + what you should do

The feeling of being in love is like nothing else.
Exciting, intoxicating, uplifting
and heartwarming; the next best thing to
experiencing love is declaring your love to the
man you love right? Well… not exactly. If you
share that sentiment sooner than he’s willing
to say it, his silence can feel insufferable. In a
flash, the ease of your relationship runs out
the door while vulnerability, discomfort and
anxiety come rushing in. Even worse, his lack
of verbal reciprocation can cause you to
reconsider the value of your relationship
In truth, your man is clearly
showing commitment when he dates you
exclusively, shares himself intimately and even
consults you while planning his schedule. Yet
there’s a tendency to judge the validity of a
relationship, as well as a man’s intention by his
willingness to say those three words. The
problem is that doing so can unnecessarily
sabotage a promising romance, which is why
it’s valuable to understand some of the reasons
why he might refrain from saying I love you.
1. Expectations
Expectations are one of the most deadly
threats to relationships because they replace
open communication with unspoken
presumptions. Many men associate saying I
love you with new expectations they are NOT
ready to fulfill. Others are simply afraid of
what those expectations might be, thus they
choose to keep everything moving along
pressure free. Does that mean that your man
isn’t willing to give you everything you want
right now? No. In fact he may already be
giving you more than you imagined. Therefore
the key is to clarify where he’s at, and what
his intentions are. Just as some men side step a
boyfriend label while simultaneously being the
best boyfriend you’ve ever had, the fear of
expectations can inspire a man to express love
through action rather than words.
Jennifer* and her boyfriend had spent two
months exploring and building their
relationship when she felt an overwhelming
sense of closeness and connection. Thus on
one beautiful evening while romantically
intertwined on the couch, Jennifer unabashedly
spoke the three words that can make or break
a relationship in progress.
I Love   You…
Her man had stated many times how crazy he
was about her, therefore she was positive her
profession of love would be warmly received as
well as returned. Instead seconds passed like
minutes ultimately revealing a deep discomfort
that had enveloped his face. Jennifer was
devastated, which brings me to the second
reason a man might not say I love you.
2. Association
Everyone associates different things with being
in love. Your man may associate saying I love
you with actions he’s not ready to take, or
other conditions he’s not yet experiencing. The
more honorable your man is, the more
important it will be for him to feel like he can
live up to his definition of what saying I love
you means. Thus instead of prematurely pulling
out of the emotional investment necessary to
yield those three words, find out what
professing love means to him specifically.
In Jennifer’s case she discovered that while her
man was comfortable being monogamous,
committed and loving, he associated saying I
love you with taking the relationship to an
even greater level. He’d been married before,
and wanted to marry again. Further exploration
revealed that he wanted to say I love you when
he felt confident about the long term future of
the relationship. Although their two months
had been wonderful, he associated more than
meaningful times with saying I love you.
3. He’s Just Not Feelin’ It
Just as you can love someone without being in
love; fabulous times, passionate kisses and
intimate love making do not necessarily = love
or being in love. It’s easy to assume that the
man who bears his soul to you on a regular
basis without wanting anyone else must be in
love with you. However as crazy as it sounds,
it’s possible for a man to share virtually every
aspect of his life with you without being in
love with you. Sometimes as much as he cares
about you, he just not in love with you. While
the truth may hurt, it’s important to discern
whether he’s closed off to loving you or simply
a late bloomer in the falling in love
So what should you do if your man won’t
say I love you?
First remember that men and women
experience and define love in all different
ways, therefore it’s critical for you to refrain
from making assumptions when he refrains
from saying I love you. Second, make it a point
to learn what your man associates with saying
I love you along with what he believes will be
expected of him. Then you’ll have a better
understanding of what saying those words
mean to him . Third, check in with yourself and
be sure that you aren’t placing greater
emphasis on words than what you’re actually
experiencing in your relationship. While it’s
easy to harp on why he won’t say I love you,
it’s equally important to understand why
you’re placing so much value on him doing so.
What’s most important in love matters is that
your individual desires and intentions are
aligned with each other so you’re clear that
you want the same outcome. Then you can be
in it fully and create a relationship that
reflects what you wish to experience today as
well as tomorrow.

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